Of Earth and Stars

I checked out Patchwork Dolls by Ysabelle Cheung from Libby and so far, am enjoying it immensely! The first story in the collection is a wonderful exploration of a brain fungus.

I am only on finishing book 7 this year, which means I'm 10% through my reading goal. I may be a little behind, but work has kept me busier in the evenings lately.

Last night we had a line of storms move through around 4 am. I know this because lightning struck somewhere very close around that time and the thunderous boom shook the windows and woke us. The dog then shivered and practically crawled underneath me for the next hour while the heavy rain continued. Thankfully, things calmed down after that, but I did not sleep as well as I would have liked due to the atmospheric rudeness.

Half of the loop follows the Creek, so you are surrounded by the light burble of water and rocky outcroppings. Much of the color in the woods right now is provided by moss and the few evergreen hollies and pines. ( +3 )

Of course, we always have to climb down to the bottom of the falls to sit by the water a bit - it's the reward for completing half the loop. There's a short video of the sound of the falls here.

thefridayfive

1. What did you want to be when you were a kid?
At around 8 or 9 I knew I loved animals and wanted to be a vet, but then at some point I realized that the job required cutting into animals and seeing them in pain, and I realized that may not be for me. In late middle/early high school I was a high-acheiver academically and everyone told me that I should be a doctor, but I think I was more interested in science and math and at one point was seriously considering biology/ecology and/or meteorology. When I left for college, I had no idea what I wanted to do for certain, based on all the advice and competing interests, and it took far too long to settle on a major. I ended up turning back to atmospheric sciences, which are similar to meteorology but have more of an exploratory feel and also a direct impact to helping people. Hence I levelled out as an environmental scientist.

2. What is your proudest accomplishment so far?
At the most basic level, I have survived some awful things. Since this questionnaire seems focused on job/career and because I (unfortunately) have tied a lot of my self-image to my professional job, I would say... I was damn proud to be a part of implementing some of the first climate change regulation in the United States under the Clean Air Act and supporting subsequent climate regulation for the last fifteen years. Unfortunately, due to the consequences of November 2024, that is now all at risk of being ripped apart, which is devastating for a whole host of reasons. Where this country goes from here will dictate whether it ever survives/comes back.

3. What is your dream job?
I don't know how to answer this anymore. I had a dream job but it has been twisted and convoluted in the last year. I hate how environmentalism is politicized when it literally is about protecting the systems that support life on Earth. Sometimes I dream of becoming a park ranger, mostly because I want to be away from people and out in nature, but realistically that would require some level of BLET and also probably relocation, both of which don't actually appeal to me. Is there a place for a burnt-out and slightly-wounded person to simply take gentle care of the land and woods?

4. Where do you see yourself in 10 years?
I cannot even begin to speculate after the last year.

5. What does it take to make you happy?
I actually do have a strong ethical core and I want to be doing work that aligns with that. This is why I have never set my sights on a higher paying job in industry (working for a chemical or oil and gas company would be much more lucrative). But I feel like it would present as much of an ethical conflict as my current predicament, and at least my current arrangement has a chance of turning things around for good (I hope).

friending_memes

The Basics
Name: ofearthandstars
Age: 46
Pronouns: they/their/them, sometimes she
Country: United States

The New Year
Do you have any resolutions?: I don't do hard and fast resolutions, but I do spend time planning and setting goals and habits I'd like to develop out in my planner. I think a big focus for 2026 is trying to find and/or create more beauty and joy in my life. Also trying to maintain my health/improve my strength.
Are there any new books, music, games, shows, etc. that you want to dive into?: Not specifically. I try to read at least one natural science/ecology/climate/environment book per month, and I enjoy science/climate/dystopian fiction, but I read a number of other genres as well. I started the year reading Greenwood by Michaal Christie and Nature's Best Hope by Douglas Tallamy. I keep up with my reading at both Fable and Storygraph.
Are there any small or big events that you're planning for this year?: Sadly no, although I am hoping to plan to explore some new hiking trails.
Any new interests/hobbies that you'd like to try out?: I'm trying to work to incorporate more art and creative writing in my life. I want to reteach myself to sketch well, I have let it linger a long time.
Did you accomplish your resolutions from last year?: Last year went entirely off the rails work wise and home wise, but I mostly kept my head above water, so... yes?
What were your favorite memories from the past year?: Hiking in Stone Mountain.
Do you have any new years traditions?: I'm starting to feel hideously boring here - I think I try to spend the day doing what I'd like to do more of during the year. This year we met up with a friend group and were social.
Is there anything you'd like to do more of in 2026?: More art, more writing, more confidence in my own abilities at work.

The New Friends
What kind of friend(s) are you searching for?: People who care about others, who stand against injustice, who love or feel a deep connection to nature, who are open-minded, love science and literature or learning in general, creatives, those learning from their past mistakes, those looking to heal old trauma, and those who simply are hanging on to get through each day. Though I'm not very picky, I do love fully and I want more connection in the world.
What do you like to read about?: All manner of things.
How often do you check your friends feed?: Currently, at least once a day, though I have leapt into periods of silence at time, I do always come back.
Do you have any deal-breakers?: Bigotry, xenophobia/racism, transphobia or homophobia, climate-change denialism, flat-earthers and other conspiracy theorists. I am not anti-faith by any means, but fundamentalism or attempts to convert others grind my teeth. Also I have a huge respect for animals and other species we share the planet with and their rights to exist independently of humans without harm, so if you're regularly posting or discussing hunting successes, we may not mesh well together.
Do you mind reading about fandom?: No. I am not particularly fannish in the sense that I don't write fanfic or create fan art, but I'm certainly not put off by it as it helps me to explore other words and perspectives.
If so, what fandoms would you like to read about?: Okay, fine. OFMD is very fun.

Currently...
Reading: An Immense World by Ed Yong and The People's Library by Veronica Henry
Watching: Stranger Things, The Pitt, Bridgerton, The Diplomat
Playing: With art supplies.... (I need to work on my musical influences).
Thinking about: How we survive a world which is going to change drastically under climate change without defaulting into authoritarianism/fascism and endless resource wars.
Hobby/Interest: Watercolors, sketching, writing (in general, but more poetry would be a start), hiking, vegan cooking, books in most flavors, weight-lifting, ecology, social justice, climate justice, sustainable living, mutual aid.
Planning for: The day he dies. The next bold hike. How to change and/or update a career mid-life.

thefridayfive

How many times a day do you . . .

1. Brush your teeth?
Usually twice (morning and evening), although having just had gum grafting done I cannot brush or floss my teeth for a period until the graft has healed. This is actually a little distressing, but I have mouthwashes and sponges to use.

2. Shower?
Typically once/day, usually right after the gym. On days I don't go to the gym, I may skip depending on my ick factor.

3. Check your E-mail?
Oof, undetermined. For personal email, usually first thing in the morning, but I also have set my phone to cycle email checks each hour. I'm not staring at it all day because I usually do not carry my phone everywhere, but I do see a notification when things pop up. For work email, I have it always open in the background, but of late Outlook's web app has been slow to refresh, which creates an issue when I miss a long chain of emails looking for a quick answer. I don't see email as a "quick answer" type of communication.

4. Check LJ? (or DW?)
I'd say at least twice (morning and evening), to try to catch up on things. I let my LJ languish a long time ago, and am okay with this decision. 

5. Eat?
Typically 4-5 times - 3 "main" meals (usually around 7:30a, 11:30a, and 7:30p), but also I typically have a protein bar or other snack early (1:30p) and late-afternoon (4:30p). I tend to function clearest when I eat smaller amounts spread over the day. 

thefridayfive

1. If you could change one life-changing event in the life of someone important to you, would you?
Yes, 100%, if only to take away their pain. Alas, I am not a time traveler, and we know about the risks to the timeline. So I can only hope distance and time will heal the wounds.

2. Which do you think is easier to do, being friends for many years, or being life partners for many years?
Isn't this one and the same? If a life partner is not a friend of the deepest sort, then what are they? If a friend walks with you through all the periods of mistakes and despair and growths, are they not a life partner? Of course, some friends, and some life partners, are with you for only the time you get.

3. Have you ever walked away from someone you considered a friend?
I cannot recall having ever walked away from a friendship, but I have lost them, and I have chosen to not pursue lost friendships that were creating more friction than joy. If that's walking away...well, I have learned that I do not have to be loved or even liked by others to have worth. I can move forward.

4. If you had to choose between telling the truth and hurting a friend or lying and making them happy, which would you choose?
I have withheld information, which is a form of a lie, but it was to avoid harm rather than to induce happiness. My mother's voice: If you can't say anything nice, don't say anything at all. I am just a pretty terrible liar with a questionable memory, so I find the truth is easiest. I've also learned so much from a group of co-workers in the last year the importance of sticking around for difficult and/or uncomfortable conversations, which I think has made me a person more honest with others and more honest with myself.

5. Which would you rather hear--the truth which will hurt, or the comforting lie?
If I am trying to walk through life living my own truth, then I would like to see yours, as well, even if it's pointy.

thefridayfive

1. Did you get an allowance as a kid, and if so, how much was it?
I think my allowance started around $2-$2.50 a week. This also seemed to be around middle school time, so I would guess early 90s, for time/inflation reference. Needless to say, it was not a lot. I made more money by doing yard work or doing well in school, and was rewarded based on report cards.

2. How old were you when you had your first job, and what was it?
Probably 12-13, and probably baby-sitting. I was not good at it, but I was paid around $15-20 to watch 3 young children for a single mom at the time, and she would leave us alone for 7-8 hours at a time. Man, they were something.

3. Which do you do better: save money or spend money?
I am a saver. After many many years of living paycheck to paycheck and practicing "simple living", I do not have a desire to own many things or a high inclination to spend.

4. Are people more likely to borrow money from you, or are you more likely to borrow from them?
The only people who borrow from me are my children, and then only people I borrow from are banks and the occasional credit card purchase (usually dental or vet coverage).

5. What's the most expensive thing you've ever bought?
By far, a house, but technically we don't actually own that outright yet? So after that, my education/school loans, and then a septic tank for this house we don't yet own.

thefridayfive

1. What's one of the nicest things a friend has ever done for you?
I have been given so much love by so many friends over my life, which occasionally contributes to my "I'm a bad friend" complex in that I feel I can't adequately return it, but notable memories: (1) A friend on here showed up with me on a court date for support when I was a demoralized shell of a person, to which I remain grateful to this day, (2) when my house was broken into many years ago (I don't exactly remember when, but it was during my single-parenting period, so between 2006-2011) and my laptop and savings jar stolen (we didn't have a lot of stuff to steal), a group of friends fundraised to help me purchase a new laptop, which was a lifeline for my work and my writing; (3) other lovely friends have sent gifts over the years, including homemade scarves, hats, trinkets, and otherwise, which are ways of letting me know I am loved. I am a sucker for handmade things because I know the labor that goes into them (and I'm really bad/unpracticed at such crafts!)

2. What's one of the nicest things a stranger has ever done for you?
Once in 1998 I was very pregnant and car-free and took the bus everywhere. One time I boarded the wrong bus and ended up in a rural backwoods area not knowing how to get back to the right route/stop for the right bus. I started walking down the two lane to try to get myself headed in the right direction for town, but was wearing a cheap pair of sandals and was moving slow. I don't remember why, but I didn't call my partner at the time, probably because he would have berated me for getting off the bus. A gentleman in a white van found me walking on the side of the road in the heat and offered me a ride. I was extremely suspect of the van, but his vibe seemed safe, and he took me back into town to the right area and dropped me off without issue. I don't remember much about our conversation, but he was a country boy with a young wife/family and could tell I was miserable in the heat, and he was honestly being kind.

3. What is a trait in another person that you instantly admire, and that draws you to them?
Someone who demonstrates thoughtfulness to the idea of diversity among circumstances and perspectives and is generous in the emotional, mental, and physical sense.

4. What is a trait in another person that instantly repels you, and prevents you from forming a close relationship with them?
Self-centeredness, close-mindedness, and especially behavoir that exhibits racist/xenophobic or homophobic/transphobic ideas.

5. Time to vent: tell us about something rotten someone has done to you.
I doubt there is much I'd feel comfortable putting in a public post. I had a falling out with a friend a few years ago that was painful, but I let it lie. I found out later that the former friend had been bad-mouthing me (and their incorrect assumptions about me) to others. I had really worked hard to not talk ill of this person, even though the breakup and loss of friendship was painful, recognizing that we grew in different directions, and coming to a place where I just wanted the best for them. I guess I'd thought they they would do the same, but I suppose I was wrong.

thefridayfive

There are two ways to handle trash and recycling in my region - the first being to carry it to a local convenience center yourself, with hauling of large items to the county dump, and the second to select a trash service that offers one or both services for you. It used to be that you had to pay for a permit for the convenience center, but a little while ago they determined that county taxes actually cover the costs of those facilities, and now they are open to everyone. So, I could do that route, but I do not love filling my car with trash to take it off, so we take advantage of one of the local services. They are quite nice people and they often put up with me running down the drive dragging a can as they pass the house and then meekly waiting by the road barely-caffeinated for them to stop once they've turned through the cul de sac. The recycling pickup is every 2 weeks, and trash pickup is once a week - which, for me and most of my friends, is the reverse of what we really need (recycling is always topped off first!) The only thing we don't have is yard waste collection, which is fine, most of my yard fellings compost naturally here, or we sometimes have a small bonfire (we only even burn natural leaves and limbs) for the things that need to be cleared for fire safety.

2. Do you separate recycling? What sort of stuff gets recycled from your household?

Yes, we always have, and I always encourage people to, as there has been an effort to revamp the National Recycling Initiative and improve the services available, even as there are understandable weaknesses and failures in the current system. (Other countries are so far ahead of the U.S. in this matter.) In our home all cardboard containers/boxes and most plastics are recycled, as well as aluminum, metal, and glass. We also have a local metals and scrap recycling center that pays by the weight that we sometimes use. Oils and car fluids can be taken to a convenience center free of charge. The hardest thing is used electronics - generally the acceptance days for these products run only once or twice a year. And we don't buy a lot of electronics, but if you miss the day you are stuck hold onto items for a while!

3. Do you take things you don't need to charity shops, or give them away online, or sell them secondhand, or ...?

I drop less at charity shops now and most things I pass through my local Buy Nothing Group. I have adult children so many household items have been passed down to them secondhand.

4. Do you pick up litter in your local area, from streets or trails or play areas or parks? Have you ever found anything interesting discarded or lost in a public space?

Yes, I do. I'm a huge believer in trying to leave places (and people) better than you found them, so when we pack for hikes I usually have a couple of bags on us and make sure to pick up found items. Once got an entire opened pocket pack of Kleenexes, which isn't very exciting, but is useful. I also keep trash bags in my car for large items, and I'm frequently picking up dropped items along our lunch walks (usually things that are scattered on trash days, my street is pretty good about not littering.)

5. Are there "repair cafés" near you to help mend fixable items? Have you ever been helped by a community repair service or volunteered for one? Do you do any other kind of upcycling?

Not so much as there used to be, I'd love to see more in our area. Most of the upcycling takes place through the Buy Nothing Group. I once got a metal headboard for a bed that is becoming a muscadine vine trellis. I recently took a cabinet a friend was giving away and "updated" it to the look I wanted with contact paper. Little things, nothing amazing.

thefridayfive

1. What is your favorite experience in your life so far?

Honestly, I don't know how to begin to answer a question like this - how do you determine a "favorite" of anything? Life changes and ebbs and flows. I'd probably have to put relatively small experiences - like standing at the ocean on the island of Maui, or even just at the edge of the Atlantic in Kure Beach.... or how I feel when I'm hiking and make it the top of the mountains. So I guess the answer is...the experiences of witnessing parts of this world that fill me with awe and a reminder of how small we are in this great expanse of a planet and a universe.

2. What motivates you to keep going every day?

Also tough to answer, because I think the occasional darkness that comes and goes in my life has been more present this year. But I do get up in the mornings and do not lay in bed all day. I guess the possibility of each day, and the animals - they always need to go outside or to be fed, and I feel an obligation to keep them well. For all of my missteps and mistakes, I do believe that I am trying to move through the world as best I can, and that each day has that opportunity to do more.

3. Where do you want to go in life? What do you want to accomplish?

*dark laughter* I once thought that I wanted to change things, for the better, for the environment, for people, for animals. I think now I am going through a crisis of feeling powerless at actually being able to do any of that, through either work or activism. I'm on a lifelong quest to learn, though. And maybe I'll also be brave someday.

4. Is there anything that you regret? Do you try to change it?

Scads and scads of regrets, things that, if I could turn back the clock with the understanding I have now, I would have saved myself and others a lot of pain. I also understand that those things helped make me who I am (for better or for worse). I do still try to change my ways of moving through the world to do the least harm, and the most good - that is why I am still in therapy, to try to tease out the parts of me that are fearful or anxious or stuck, and how to move onwards.

5. What is your most cherished gift you have received? Why do you cherish it so much?

About a year before she passed, my mother crocheted me my own afghan, in my favorite greens. It is the dearest thing I own now. Unfortunately one night after she passed it slipped off the bed and next to the rats' housing, and they happily nested off a corner of it. My now MIL helped me to find someone who could fix it, and they ended up removing about 3-4 inches and then re-stitching what was left (I wish that they had been able to truly repair it with the pattern, but I guess they couldn't find the same yarns). So I am also always a little happy and a little sad when I use it, but on days when I feel like I can't go on, it is the closest thing I have to my mother's arms around me.